being nice to people who are harassing you is a survival tactic. girls learn this by the time they turn 12, if you flat out tell a guy no, he’ll become angry & the situation will get worse, sometimes even violent. you are taught to be nice and let them down easy, which then you are accused of “leading them on”. There is no winning, you just got to choose which you find less horrible.
last year one night me and my old roommates were all playing twister and mike was on the spinner and halfway through the game he kind of mumbled to himself “i sure hope im calling these right” and then everyone in the room simultaneously remembered that mike was colorblind